Ye Olde Drunken Charter

Being in the Drunkards of Norrath is kind of like being in a cult. People think you're crazy, you often are looked down upon, you get brainwashed, but in the end you know they're all doomed to eternal hell and you get to live in space behind comet's.

Members of the drunkards come from all walks of life. Be they, uh, barbarian, like Fission... or be they, Dark Elven, like Twyl, they are bound by one single goal. Except this goal is a special goal. Unlike most goals, this goal is actually not a goal, it is more of a sweet sweet thing we know as alcohol. Alcohol is what binds Norrath together. Any who deny this are obviously led astray from our truth by their gods. Sure they may slay dragons, acquire items of lore, and probably leave pretty damn good lives. But they can never partake in that one true secret all drunkards know. And that secret (which, by the way is a VERY well kept secret) is too secret for me to write here. But if you DO know the secret, you know *points to his head* the true truth of the world.

Many things are asked of you if you are a new drunk, such things could be as a simple as a questions like; Where do babies come from?, or as complicated as another questions like; are you going to finish that?
When being asked favors as a drunk it is ALWAYS important to remember beer. If you have some beer in a backpack, make a decision based on that. Most will tell you to actually think of what the favor is, but they obviously do not know the secret *points to his head again*.

To help with day to day life Twyl has formed a number of postulates. These are to be taken to heart. Of course since Twyl made these up whilst drunk they can nae all be remembered. But regardless, take them to heart.
Here are some of them now:

  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #21 - Never EVER refuse to buy a drink for a lady.
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #18 - When drunk, a dwarf is just as likely to eat an ogre, as an ogre is to eat a
  • dwarf.
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #42 - When in doubt, remember the first golden postulate (see postulate #1).
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #36 - Always try to be witty (alcohol increases ones wit two fold by the way).
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #12 - Order Once, Drink Once, Pass out Once... Order 20 times, Drink 20 times, Pass out once. See the loophole I found?
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #8 - Everyone is shorter than Twyl.
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #3 - No matter what they tell you, Halfling clerics do not like Dark Elves.
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #44 - Booze before all else... unless you want something first.
  • Twyls Drunken Postulate #19 - With the right amount of nectar, even a gnome can be sexy.


    •

    These postulates have gotten Twyl through many tough times, and he hopes they will help others too.

    With all that you have just read fresh in your mind you must now be realizing that many Drunkards are crazy, and that my friend, brings you one step closer *points to his head*



    So what does all this mean? Well, The Drunkards are just that; Drunkards. We're a guild of oft lazy bastages who enjoy the company of like minded individuals. We're not an uber guild, or a fledgling guild who outfits their members in armor from various raids, and we don't have much in the ways of guild politics.

    Purpose:

    Here's the good part, we have none. When you join the Drunkards you have no obligations, and the only benefits are those you make for yourself. We only seek to have a nice time amongst ourselves and others we encounter. We don't alter the worlds we live in greatly (or even at all) and we kinda like it that way. A good way to sum us up would be simple (perhaps lazy is a better word); our lives don't revolve around anything in-particular.